About Venus Golf - Venus Vision

“Women play golf for relationships; it is very personal." - Venus

Welcome to golf on earth. Because so many couples are entering into the game, this is the ideal time to take a closer look at the differences between men and women and see how we can make this game a more positive experience for both sexes. In February of 2004 Debbie released her second book, Venus On the Fringe, with the subtitle Creating a Swing That Works for Humans! With this second book, Debbie explains there are no differences between men and women regarding the short game, it is all about technique.

The first questions to ask is why do men choose to play golf in the first place, and why do women choose to play golf? From the research and feedback I have gathered, men choose to play golf because it is a challenge. Golf is a game men love to conquer. It is the endless quest for perfection, and they spend lots of blood, sweat, tears, and money trying to beat the invisible foe, “Old Man Par.”

Women, on the other hand play golf for relationships; it is very personal. Women play golf to spend time with their husbands, friends, kids and clients. The experience of being with people they care about is important to them. Although women can enjoy competition, the main priority for playing golf is to have fun. If they do not achieve this goal they will probably not stick with it.

The very act of choosing an instructor says a lot about the differences between men and women. The pro for a man better be up to date with the latest in golf technology and information. Men care a lot about how much their instructor "knows."

Conversely, women want to know how much their instructor "cares." Females need to actually like the person who is teaching them. It is a bonding experience for women to take golf lessons, much like spending time with their hairdresser, massage therapist or real estate agent. A golf instructor to a woman represents a friend and confidant.

Remember that a woman's motivation for playing golf is to have a positive experience. Women tend to internalize negative feedback more than their counterparts, so golf needs to be kept light, simple and fun. When golf starts to resemble rocket science, the typical woman will get into her space ship and leave.

We need to be aware of our differences when men and women play golf together. Remember, women are playing for a positive experience, not to perfect themselves. If a woman is paired with a male and he is analyzing her every swing, it feels as though she is wearing a billboard across her chest that reads, “FIX ME.” Many men go right into their “fix it” mode when they are playing with the woman they love, even though they would hate it for that very woman to do the same thing to them.

If a woman were to correct a male on every other swing, it would not be a pretty sight. John Gray, in his book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, recommends that a woman not give unsolicited advice to men about anything. A male will interpret this as critical and unloving, even offensive.

The best solution for couples playing golf together is to split the partners up, letting the guys ride with each other and gals ride together. This not only speeds up the play as both sexes can play from their own tees, but allows the guys to speak “Martian” with each other, while the gals try to come up with the “Venetian” solution for golf and life.